• I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it
• Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old
was resisting a rest.
• The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table
was Sir Cumference.
• When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
• The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a
small medium at large.
• A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
• We’ll never run out of math teachers because they
• When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, UCLA.
• The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes
was on shaky ground.
• The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
• If you take a laptop computer for a run, you could jog
• A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
• A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tired.
• Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
• A backward poet writes inverse.
• A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
• With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
• Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I’ll
show you A-flat miner.
• When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
• The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully-recovered.
• A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulting
in Linoleum Blownapart.
• You are stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.
• He broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.
• A calendar’s days are numbered.
• A boiled egg is hard to beat.
• When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought
• Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
• Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses.
• Acupuncture: a jab well done